Weirdest things Bahamian male teens do

Teenagers are in a tough place where they aren't quite an adult, and not quite a child so there's a lot of confusion and angst. When you hear the word "Teen" anywhere else would think rebellious, moody, confused, and crazy. The male teen population in the Bahamas are on another whole different level, and here's proof.

"My girlfriend of one week left me I loved her, its true it was on facebook and everything"

!. The wholesale purchases of Starch
For some odd reason male teens seem to think their clothes are not nearly hang glider material worthy. Usually when someone irons they spray a little starch to prevent wrinkles or to get rid of wrinkles, but not teenagers we are hardcore. Teens spray down their shirts and pants with so much starch it looks like their clothes were folded and spent a century under 20,000 pounds of pressure. I have no idea where it started or why, and I don't think they know themselves. At some point some kid figured one spray of starch is for pussies, and I am a bad lets go all out. He was probably confused about the application of starch and then went to school with his uniform and his friends thought the paper bag look was hip. The end result was an awkward robotic moving teenagers with starch lines that seem to resemble they were attacked by snails.

"Because just regular starch are for punks, but lavender smells soooooo good"

2. Pants in socks
I have no clue why teenagers even do this. Maybe they didn't want the bottom of their pants to get dirty? Or they love the feeling of having their body heat trapped, and having quarts of sweat slosh around in their under garments. Just putting pants in normal white socks aren't just enough, we have to make it a fashion. Blue socks, Red socks, Brown socks, plaid designs, star designs, checkered designed, multi-colored, a whole array of socks to match the outfit they are wearing. Combined with stiff paper bag starch pants and we have a match made in heaven.

"Nothing expresses teen angst and fashion like socks in pants, plus I love looking like a idiot"

3. Leaving a patch of hair uncut
Getting a haircut is pretty commonplace amongst men, we do it to look good for women, relief from the heat, and get/keep a job. Some rain man of a teen decided I'm a cut above the rest, to display that I will leave a small area of hair uncut.That surely would go over well. The end result was teenagers strolling around with discount haircuts, and very shady looking characters walking around. Oh no it doesn't stop there, some teens figured just one patch wasn't cool and bad ass enough. How about we not cut the whole back of my head and call it a shag, yes a shag the ugly 60s carpet that died along with disco. Oh you thinks that's all? Nope since teenagers are easily influenced by other trends such as locks, not only did they have a patch of outgrown hair but they have started to lock it! So now they have hanging spaghetti strings coming out of their head like some bad Rasta experiment gone wrong.

"I'm ahead of the curve, I'm a trendsetter"

4. Obsession with Polo and Tommy Hilfiger
I like name brands as much as the next guy, but they aren't the only thing in my wardrobe. One step into the mall or a club in the Bahamas you start to notice a trend amongst the younger crowd. They all have on collared shirts! Not only that, they are wearing golfing clothes for everything from dress up day in high school to church. Yes Polo and Tommy Hilfiger were originally designed for the white middle to upper class those who golfed. Granted Bahamian teenagers aren't as silly with their collared shirts as a lot of Americans who flip the collars up like some 1850s Baron. Polo shirts and Starched pants are a must for a night on the town, not like your going to encounter someone wearing the same thing right? Awkwardddddddd.

"Hey ladies am I over stimulating your ovaries yet?"

5.Obviously they are going to return it after wearing it. Keeping the tags on everything.

The act of keeping the tags on clothes after buying them is to return them after wearing them once to look good for that outing. It can be a good idea for a teenager not making much money and only going on allowance, But here's the kicker they have STYLIZED THIS, Bahamian teenagers made it standard to show off the tags to show off that they purchased an article of clothing. Not only do they keep it on their shirts and pants, they have extended it to hats, watches, shoes, shades, and even socks I have witnessed. Imagine everyday you witness this rare oddity of a teen wearing brown bag approved starch pants tucked into socks, tags dangling off of them, and a patch of locked hair on their head. Scary right? Steve Urkle would be proud.

"My badges of honor, I have proof see?"